If football teams were women.

[manutd 4 ever]

Arsenal - Angelina Jolie
Looks good, a bit maverick at times and you know they have the
potential to really screw you over

Aston Villa - Dido
One big hit. Fairly inoffensive really

Birmingham City - Mariah Carey
Occasionally interesting, frequently annoying.

Blackburn Rovers - Melanie Sykes
Common as muck Lancy, constantly worrying.

Bolton Wanderers - Natalie Imbruglia
Always looks like she might go down but never does

Charlton Athletic - Martine McCutcheon
Chirpy Cockney with the ability to spring a few surprises

Chelsea - Jordan
Dominated by t*ts. Quite repulsive
really

Everton - Barbara Windsor
Been laughing at those t*ts so long we forget that once upon a time they actually looked quite good

Fulham - Andrea Corr
Not bad to look at but not much of her. Seems a bit awestruck with fame


Liverpool - Sophie Ellis Bextor
Individually all the components look fantastic - just doesn't work
when put together.

Man City - Madonna
Have been big at times - now lost the plot a bit - ageing stars.
Nice new home though

Man United - Rachel Stevens
Every bit looks good from all angles.

Middlesborough - Tara Palmer Tompkinson
Can look quite good at the back - but nothing at all up front to
speak of.

Newcastle United - Christina Aguillera
Can look good. Various unsavoury elements though.

Portsmouth - Chrissie Hynde
On the face of it a has-been but you're quite interested in what she's
going to do next

Sunderland - Patsy Palmer
Generally a bit crap and second rate really, but some people like her


Tottenham - Joan Collins
Used to look good, but living on past glories.


West Ham - Britney Spears
Been threatening to go down for the last few years, but finally did
it this year.

Wigan- Kylie Minogue
Sometimes you feel sorry for them, they’re not huge and you've got a
bit of a soft spot.


good eh?

[Pearson]

No lol. West Ham havent been threatening to go down for a few years and they finally did it this year. Quite the opposite. And id swap man utd with chelsea. Chelsea look good from all angles. Man Utd don't.

[D3c3p7ioN]

Where did you steal that from ;)?

[bambizzle]

lol, thats pretty good

[DJDanny2020]

lol not bad, some are true hehe :)

[manutd 4 ever]

Where did you steal that from ;)?

what do u mean?....

[jesus'_bright_red_pants]

Don't act all innocent ;) :D

[LukeEv_17]

ive got to agree with pearson and 'Tottenham - Joan Collins
Used to look good, but living on past glories.' they look good at the moment.

too many faults to correct

[manutd 4 ever]

Don't act all innocent ;) :D

c'mon folks..im confused now.

[Mamfy]

Heh that;s funny

And shay, they're saying they don't think you're clever enough to write it yaself;) SO musta got it from somewhere:D

[Pearson]

Heh that;s funny

And shay, they're saying they don't think you're clever enough to write it yaself;) SO musta got it from somewhere:D

mamfy, mamfy, mamfy.....iv got a feeling you dont get half of them, maybe even all of them

[Mamfy]

Where did that feeling come from?:S

[bambizzle]

mamfy, mamfy, mamfy.....iv got a feeling you dont get half of them, maybe even all of them

and ive got a feeling you just think that because your sexist

[LukeEv_17]

well for your information bambizzle pearson is not sexist as i am one of his mates and should know!

[bambizzle]

well then, i guess i should take your word for it

[LukeEv_17]

well yeah unless you want to come to sheffield and find out for yourself!

[bambizzle]

ill pass on that one, veen though i might be up there in a few weeks anyway, seein my brother

[LukeEv_17]

u not going to the reading vs wednesday match then?

[bambizzle]

yeah blatently i am, i mean a few weeks after that i might be up there

[jesus'_bright_red_pants]

I CAN'T FECKING GO TO THAT GAME ! The lad I usually go with is at 6th form and the coaches set off at 2.30pm. Gutted cos i finish at 11.30 that day :(

[bambizzle]

who else heres going to the reading game then ?

[jesus'_bright_red_pants]

I might go on my own :(

[LukeEv_17]

i can't make it due to family duties but i'll be there in spirit and at hillsborough for every other game this season

[Mamfy]

Pearson you didn't answer me :|

[Pearson]

I CAN'T FECKING GO TO THAT GAME ! The lad I usually go with is at 6th form and the coaches set off at 2.30pm. Gutted cos i finish at 11.30 that day :(

i have tuesdays off but no1 will go with me, same reason as kellatron

O n manfy i never sin you on the footyboards or owt so dint think u new owt bout footy.... as for the slanderous comments about me being a sexist, girls opinions on football are just as accepted as mens. Kelly is a female, I listen to everything she says as she is an avid owl and a knowlegable 1. And knowledge is the Bomb! Girls football is shit though, thats not a sexist comment, it just is

[manutd 4 ever]

^ pearson mate, your speaking the truth, Girls football is too 'soft' not enough meaty challenges.

[Mamfy]

Pearson, i don't know tons about football like you do but I know enough to get the joke.

[bambizzle]

womens football is actually pretty funny to watch. theyr averagely skillful but i agree not enough tackling

[Pearson]

thats a women's footballer in my class. She is awful, no better than the worst player in the F division of the sunday league, seriously.

[xxrachxx]

we have a girl footaller in our class, and shes blood brilliant, she takes on all the lads and scores sum reyt goals!