Your opinion, if you please =D

[Spazzy]

Mhmmm.....so there's this guy...((haha I love when stories start of this way)) and it just so happens I'm completely in love with him. He tells me he loves me back, but he also shows it. We buy presents for each other, he takes me on dates, we talk together all the time...basically our relationship is going very well. We dated for a year, but then things got really rocky and we broke up...he told me he hated me, but one of his friends let it slip that he was doing it so I would find someone else (he thought he wasn't good enough for me...), and six months after that we got back together. During the time we were apart, I turned sixteen, which is the legal age of consent in Arkansas. I never stopped loving him, and in fact, I feel like I've grown to love him more as I watched his life from the outside. When we together for the first time, we were together for about 5-6 months before we started "fooling around" (I was fifteen and he was seventeen) and we pretty much got as close to actual intercourse as you can without penetration =/ During the time we broke up, he never got with anyone else...but I guess you can say I got a little more experienced...anyway, I've never had sex but I don't consider myself a virgin because I've done oral and I've gotten oral and we've "touched" each other and everything...

Okay, this huge giant paragraph boils don to this one question XD:

Do you think we're ready for sex?

I'm on BP and we plan to use a condom...but I'm just wondering what you guys would think about a 16 year old having sex with an 18 year old? I know I'm at the age of consent...but I don't know...I love him so much and the feelings he gives me are undescribable....I want to make love to him, I don't just want sex...but am I too young to be feeling this way? Your opinion please...

[Darts]

Well, I'm not sure about anything else, but what I do want to say is NEVER EVER believe what your boyfriend's friends say. No matter if it's his best friend that he never lies to, no matter how good a friend he is to YOU, no matter WHAT.

I don't think it would be the best time myself because sometimes when you're that deeply in love it clouds other things, so you should wait until this lovely initial relationship feeling dies down a bit and you can view everything clearly. This will make you feel more strongly about all the things that are revealed to mean the most to you, and what you can see means the most to him.

This might not appear to make any sense lol. Basically, feeling that it's the right time often means you're being swept away.

But if you do have sex with him then equally it won't do you any harm and will obviously be enjoyable.

Then again, if you want it to last longer, you need to think about what repercussions it will have in the future. Although this will be difficult too because you havent been through it before and seen it happen.

I am also talking bullshit now and will henceforth cease to type in this thread. Byeeeeee! xx

[Spazzy]

Well, I dunno..it's just...this feeling doesn't feel like when we first started dating...at that time I was more obsessed with him. When I'm around him now, I'm just calm...My time away from him showed that I don't actually need to be around him, it just makes me really happy. And like I said we've done just about everything else, I don't think sex would be much different, just another step?

And btw, it was more like a mutual friend haha if he ever lied to me he knows I'd strap him to a bed and pluck out his ball hair with tweezers.....=P

[Darts]

If you trust him then fair enough but you have to be careful in a relationship on how much you rely on what another person has said to form an opinion of your boyfriend.

Sex can be a lot more than just another step though, and it alters who you are. People may think it makes no difference but it really does. It's a shame for everyone nowadays to be brought into a world where losing one's virginity happens in your teens, when actually it should be a lot later than that. Everyone knows it, lots of people think it, but they do it anyway because they can't resist the temptation, and it then turns into a habit rather than anything else.

Lots of things that seem so sweet and fun you'll one day take no pleasure in, but it's up to you whether you think it will be worth it. Everybody's different. Take it from me, I wouldn't stop having sex either but that's only because it's a part of me now because of the choices that I've made. It's like young mothers, they love their kids with all their heart and wouldn't give them up for the world, but they still wish they'd waited a bit longer to give the kid a better chance.

It's like giving your relationships in the future a better chance.

[Spazzy]

I'm hoping this will be my last relationship...haha maybe I'm just naive...

[Spazzy]

Oh and when I said it wouldn't change anything, I meant for the worse. Of course that changes people, but I want us to be the ones that change each other....that's just how I feel. (He's a virgin too btw, he says it and I believe him)

[Darts]

Nooo that isn't naive at all. Except this situation reminds me so much of the guy I was with when I lost my virginity. I felt exactly as you do, we'd planned loads of stuff. But after the first year I started to resent all the plans he had for us, because I wanted to take life as it happened and be my own person and not already know what I'm gonna call my kids or what year I'll get married etc.

After I left him I found out allsorts, that he'd lied to me about not being a smoker, that he'd probably cheated on me (there's no proof and he denied it but it fits) and that he was a completely different person.

You'll never ever believe me until it happens, and hopefully it won't, but taking that chance is a huge gamble. It's good to gamble and take chances for someone you love. It's good to have faith in people. It's devastating to lose that gamble. It really is your choice and I wish you all the best whatever, I don't think there's a right or wrong solution to your issue, and I feel happy to be me as I am at the moment. So it's how you feel and whether you want something more that matters.

[Spazzy]

Thanks for the advice =]

All I can say now is that, even if he is using me or lying to me or hiding something or just basically not in it, that doesn't matter to me. HE'S the first person I fell in love with, HE'S the first person that made me feel like I mattered. This is a gift I want for him, what he does with it is his own choice...

I was more talking about if I should do it morally haha, but thanks a lot for talking to me!

[Darts]

Erm, no worries I guess.

[1truelove]

i think if ur in love that much with him than do what u feel is right if u wanna have sex do it if he loves you back as much as u love him than it wont be just about sex lol i mean if yall have already done that much then just give it up to him make love and dont forget the condom b-c thats really not cool lol but ya just do what feels right to u who cares what other ppl think lol

[Leon]

I think Cherie's pretty much covered what I was going to say here. :)

[Me...x]

Mate dnt worry bout the age difference. I'm 14 nd i've done it with (admitedly a very drunk and high) 19 yr old.
As long as ur absolutly SURE its wat u want...x

[Bob!]

So a drunk and high 19 year old was what you wanted? :/

[*Jess*]

Loving, meaningful relationship.

[Me...x]

Ok so it wasnt my smartest move point taken.

[jem]

if you love him i would say yes. and the age thing is fine in my opinion. The only thing is that you have to ask people if youre ready. If your not sure yourself if your ready, your not! when yo are actually ready you will know and wont need to think about it

[Bird of Prey]

Well, since you both love eachother, the act of love is a good thing. In my opinion you're ready. Just make sure everything's safe (condom.)

And, er, "have a good time!"

[Sweetest.x.Sin]

I think you should wait until you're 18, just awhile and if you still feel the same way and are still together going on strong then yeah you might be ready for it, but I wouldn't have sex at 16 because you are too young to be feeling this way and if you had a couple more years to mature, because feelings can change, then you might regret it if you did it right now.
It's your decision though, but I'm just telling you you might end up regretting it.