Help my boyfriend is a sadist!

[Des_olate]

Over the almost two years that i've been with "X" (don't want to reveal names) i began to realize that he is a sadist. At first the pain he inflicted was small; it was things like non-flesh wounding love bites (meaning i didnt bleed) and pinching me. As time progressed it became worse; he started 2 make me bleed. Just recently he began burning my skin off with an eraser and pouring wax onto my arms. I love him and he hasn't done anything 2 me that i didn't agree to, but it scares me to think that i may be a masochist and i dont like hiding my wounds because it makes me feel paranoid. Another thing thats been on my mind is that he is into bdsm and has a collar in a jewelery box (or something) on his nightstand...he told me i can have it whenever i want. I really love him, which is why i let him do those things to me, but i don't know if i should ever put that collar on and become his masochistic "servent" / lover (or whatever). Please give me some advice on what i should do.

[Wacko1574]

y u still with him if he burns and makes u bleed....are u that blind...i mean come on...and u still love him too....some tymes i rlly dnt get ppl :/

[Des_olate]

He's a really nice person beyond those things that's why i love him. I don't want to regret letting go of someone i've come to love despite the fact that he's a sadist, which was a hard thing for me to understand at first.

[Wacko1574]

sweety lsn to urself.....nice people dont do that....and i admire the way you still love him but i dont think its a way of living....well maybe someone else may have another opinion but...i dude who hurts you....well have you talked to him abt this?...maybe it could help telling him how it hurts....but you still love him and stuff :)

[Sweetest.x.Sin]

Okay, seriously. That's sick what he is doing to you.
Dump him already, or it's just going to get worse. Especially if you can't stand up for yourself and say no. There should be a limit, and if he was a nice person he wouldn't be doing shit like that to you.

[Wacko1574]

^^GO GURL!! :)

[Thatisjustsoyou]

Okay, first off I don't really see how you can call this person sick. A large amount of people are into Bondage and the like.
Anyway, if you like him doing these things to you, carry on. If you don't, tell him and ask him to stop. If he loves you, he will.
Same with the collar, if you don't want to, don't.
You said you agreed to it, so he may not realise if you don't like it or not, as he did ask and you've said yes.
Talk about it, there may even be a compromise you can both come to.
Don't just dump him like said above, you obviously love him. There's no point in throwing away a two-year relationship 'cause you'd rather dump someone than talk to them about something like this.
Good luck x

[*Jess*]

Yeah, he's not doing it to be sick. He sees it as a turn on.
If you really don't like it, tell him to tone it down a bit. He's doing it for sexual pleasure, not to actually hurt you.
If he's so lovely, then he'll understand and you can come to a compromise. he's doing it because he loves you even though that sounds stupid.

[Wacko1574]

^^i cnt believe that ppl do it for pleasure....sheesh thats weird o_O

[Thatisjustsoyou]

^^i cnt believe that ppl do it for pleasure....sheesh thats weird o_O


Just 'cause you don't like it, doesn't make it weird.

[Wacko1574]

HA! its not abt me liking it or not......but i jst never heard of it and it is weird to me....even if i did hear of it i still think its weird and sick for ppl to do that for pleasure....with all respect to ppl who DO LIKE IT...and besides...she is getting hurt and bleeding....so its her choice rlly not mine...we are all jst posting opinions here...:)