Please help me! I hurt.

[Guest]

Hi, everyone. I'm a 16 year old girl and I'm desperate. Just hear me out.
I have vaginismus. This is a psycholigical disorder that, for whatever reason, makes the walls of my vagina contract as penetration occurs. Believe me, it's painful. I've had sex a few times and hated it. I hate this ridiculous disease. Please, don't critisize me. Sex is not a bad thing, a sin, or disgusting. It's not wrong to want to find a cure. I can't even use tampons, for crying out loud! There are treatments and clinics and support groups, but none of them are for me. I just want to stop hurting. Please help me.

Yours truly in pain

[saraharms1]

Dang...

That really sucks. I would hate it if I had it. So you have my sympathy. To be honest I have no clue how to help you. I mean... you say tampons even hurt... Have you ever had oral sex to see if thats comfortable? You should try and find out what ways are comfortable for you to be intimate with your partner and stick with those until you can find a cure. Thats the best advice I can give...

[Fairy]

O_O ouch 4 starters!O_O
Hav u gone 2 da doctors??
Or try da chemist...see if they have any creems 4 it.

[NATAL!E]

Go to your doctors for advice. Im afraid that's probably he only way to find a cure for you.

Good luck.

[panic!]

I know you say the treatments are not for you but I think you should try something.
I got this from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus
~
About: Vaginismus can be compared to the response of the eye shutting when an object comes towards it. A woman with vaginismus learns to expect pain to come with penetration and so her mind automatically sends a signal to her PC muscles to clamp shut, thus making penetration either impossible or very painful. For example, if a teenage girl is told that the first time she has sex it will be very painful, she may develop vaginismus because she expects pain. Every time the fear is confirmed, the brain is being "shown" that sex does hurt and that the reflex reaction of the PC muscles is needed. Most women who suffer from vaginismus do not realise they have it until they try to insert a tampon or have sex for the first time and so it may come as quite a shock to them.
Treatment: If the cause of vaginismus is psychological (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological) then it is usually important to treat those aspects of the problem as well as the actual muscle spasm. This will usually require help from a therapist or psychologist as it is very important to get to the root of the problem.
If the vaginismus does not have any psychological grounds then physical treatment alone may be enough to fix the problem. This includes sensate focus exercises, exploring the vagina (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagina) and desensitization (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desensitization) involving vaginal dilators. Dilating involves inserting objects (usually mildly resembling a penis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Penis) in shape), into the vagina. Whatever objects the woman chooses to use for dilation, they should gradually increase in size as she progresses. Medical dilators can be obtained from online resources but are often quite expensive. There are many other options though, some women use vegetables and candles covered with a condom (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom), q-tips (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q-tips) or simply their own fingers. It is very important to use personal lubricant (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personal_lubricant) whilst dilating as it makes insertion a lot easier and less painful.
The process of curing vaginismus is usually a long one and will require patience, will power and determination; in almost all cases it can be successfully treated. Many people don't take into account the emotional problems associated with vaginismus such as low self esteem, insecurities and often even depression (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clinical_depression), so it is very important that if women choose to seek the help of professionals, they should try to find someone who is very understanding and who has previous experience with vaginismus.
Links.
info on vaginismus- http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001487.htm
treatment products- http://www.vaginismus.com/

good luck,
bye :)

[xstardudex]

To A Doctor Quick B4 It Gets Worse!!

[Gatita]

Ask for advice at your doctor, maybe he/she cam helo you, think this is a very common problem and you will solve it.
kisses

[Darts]

Come on guys, look at post dates, I'm sure more advice on this same problem wouldnt be helpful. It's good to find old threads but don't dig them up unless you have a problem that is relevant that you want to ask people about within the thread!

And by the way, 'to the doctor' perhaps wouldn't do much anyway, cos it isn't a physiological disease it's a psychological one, and so thats not really the kind of treatment needed. I think anyone suffering from this would need to use their own will power (No I am not referring to toe sucking skills) and gradually get themselves used to the idea.

[Will]

Does that have to get mentioned in every damn thread?

[Darts]

Oh will! I didn't know you cared!!! *trails off in fits of giggles*